My Ministry

I haven't taken the time to write for a long time, but today God has laid something on my heart that I pray will be an encouragement to other moms who go through the same struggles that I do.  

Over the last couple of weeks, my husband and many friends have been busily preparing for the summer camp season, which started with staff training this week, and the first campers will arrive tomorrow morning.  I have found a few opportunities to help out here and there, running to town to pick up supplies, browsing Youtube videos and skit scripts to pass along to the Chapel Team, and wiping tables while my kids play on the playground for a few minutes, but for the most part, my life has been very similar to always.  I've been 'mom-ing'.  

Towards the end of the week, watching everybody else give a hundred percent of their effort towards the work at the camp, while I played on the playground or at the beach with my kids, or read books to them on the couch, even one day needing to stay home from camp for a few hours because my kids were over-tired and needed to rest, I began to get discouraged.  Even when the hectic summer season isn't going on around me, there are so many times when this voice of guilt speaks in my heart, saying, "Really, you're JUST a mom?  You could be doing so much more for the ministry.  Playing with your kids on the beach is a waste of time.  You should be more.  You should do more."  I feel lazy, leaving the dirty dishes in the dish pit at camp for someone else to wash because my 22-month-old wants me to hold his hand on the slide.

But, throughout this weekend, God has been working in my heart, reminding me in so many different ways that, for me, right now, THIS is my calling.  This IS ministry.  The homemade playdough recipes, the diapers, the freezie pops, kisses for boo-boos, questions and conversations about everything on the planet (or in space)...  I am busy with the ministry of raising the next generation of world-changers.  My boo-boo kisses and diaper changes teach them about gently caring for others (whether they know it yet or not).  I have opportunities every single day, in moments of discipline and in our daily conversations, to lead my children's hearts into a closer knowledge of the God we serve, and a deeper relationship with Him.  

This morning, God brought to my mind my mother-in-law, and the way God has multiplied her mothering ministry.  She raised three boys, my husband and his two brothers.  Each of those boys now serve in a different ministry in three different states across the country, and she and her husband serve in their church as well.  Each of these men are known in their churches and communities for their godly wisdom and selfless service in their ministries.  FOUR states are now being impacted rather than just one, because of the years of faithful ministry by one mother.  I know she had to balance ministry and motherhood.  My husband talks about going along with her and helping her with various tasks at the church where his father was a pastor.  I also know she dedicated her life to raising up godly men, and by God's grace, He has answered her prayers, and I know she is so grateful for His blessings.  God has also blessed her with five grandchildren (so far), and as her boys pass on the godly character traits they have been surrounded with over the years, that, in turn, multiplies her influence even more widely.   

So, if you, like me, are a mom who has struggled with your purpose in mothering, or if you're being told by someone else, (or even by your own occasional feelings of guilt) that being 'just' a mom is not enough, if the business of your mothering has brought you to a place where you've had to step back from other ministries, remember: Mothering is a ministry.  It is the most important ministry we will ever, ever have, and no one else can take the place of a mother who is daily invested in drawing her children's hearts closer to God.

Can I pray for you?  If this post touched your heart, and you need prayer and encouragement, leave me a comment - I would love to keep you in prayer!!  Any suggestions or ideas on balancing motherhood and ministry would be welcomed as well! :)  

It's Officially Summer!!!

I said at one point that I was going to try to share more about our camping ministry this summer but I guess I really haven't so far! I've been so busy AT camp (and home) that I haven't had time to write about camp! :) Well, we had two wonderful work groups here last week, they helped with all kinds of projects around the camp, and we served them meals. I just went up to camp to eat meals and visit with the staff and visiting teens, and I helped my hubby with a couple of office projects from home. Up until this point, Natalie hasn't really had very much of a schedule in her day, but with the set mealtimes of camp, it will be helpful for her to have a routine, so we worked on adjusting her to that, and after about 10 days now, it is going really well.


This week is our senior staff training - our counselors and senior staff are here this week, training for the summer and getting to know one another. This is always my favorite week of the summer - meeting and getting to know the staff is always such a blessing - they are always so sweet to our family, including Z and Natalie, and I love that our kids have so many opportunities to interact with great college and high school age 'kids'. :)

So, the plan was for us to continue just going up for meals and helping from home when we could, but because of some extra things going on this summer, my husband has a LOT on his plate. So he asked me for help. The bottom line is that I will be helping to organize the Monday morning youth camp registrations (as I have done for the last three years). This will require me to leave the kids with a staff member a couple of hours during the week, and for a couple hours on those four Monday mornings. Not a big deal, right?

Well, as I was reviewing the list that I had written of 'helpful tips for youth camp registration' and remembering how I had joyfully written it at the end of last summer, looking forward to handing my job off to someone else so I could stay home full-time (and not having to do registration - my least favorite part of my job - anymore), I started to throw myself a pity party. Then I took my annoyance out on my hubby, which is always so helpful, isn't it? (sarcasm...)

Anyway, God pulled me out of that pit, and gave me a good couple of hours in the office yesterday morning with an amazing friend who is volunteering her time (and also leaving her kids) to come and help with registration and office duties at camp. He helped me to feel like I am getting a good start on getting things organized for Monday's senior high camp registration, and thankfully He helped me to remember most of what I learned over the last three summers (I think). Natalie slept the whole time, and Z had a great time with one of our staff members who does a great job with kids, and he adores her.

And do you know what the greatest benefit of working yesterday was? Today. I was supposed to go to the office this morning again while a friend watched my kids, but something came up and she and her husband left town suddenly, so I found out that I would be staying home today. And it was wonderful. Working just a couple of hours yesterday reminded me what a privilege and a joy it truly is to be able to stay home with my babies every day. So I guess maybe God is giving me this opportunity to gain perspective, and also some (more) empathy for working moms who wish they could stay home. And after getting over my initial grouchiness, I truly am glad to be involved in the camp ministry again, though in a different way than I thought I would be. (and, honestly, I wrote this yesterday, and today as I was cleaning bathrooms and thinking about it, I realized anew that it isn't nearly as big of a deal as I made it out to be.)

In other news, Z went down the camp's big waterslide with Daddy this week, and he was SO cute at the bottom! I wish I had taken a picture! He went under the water briefly at the bottom (in a life jacket), which scared him, and when he came up and Daddy held him, he was so funny. When we asked him if the slide was fun, he kept saying, "My face went in the water. My head went in the water." but then he said he would go again, 'later'. :) I'm thinking that next time we're at the beach may not be 'later' enough for him... :)

Our kitchen staff, grounds crew, and chapel staff come tonight (some have already arrived!) and stay until tomorrow, so it will be fun to meet them and get them on board for the summer!

Hope you're having lots of fun this summer, too, and God is blessing you with new perspectives and lots of learning opportunities! :)

Summer Goals - 2010

Well, I don't often write a ton about camp here, and I'm not sure why. But I thought that some of my readers might like to hear a little more about our summer and all that we do at camp, and also be able to pray for us as we minister to the campers God brings to us this year!

I am a little less involved in camp this summer than I have been in the past, since I don't officially 'work' at camp anymore, as I did last summer and the two summers before that. Last year, I worked in the office part time, taking Z with me to work each day. It was a dream situation in some ways - being able to work part-time without leaving Z with a babysitter was amazing. But last summer was hard, too - for sweet Z especially - imagine being 18 or 19 months old, and every single day you have to walk past a pond where kids or families are swimming and a playground with kids playing all over it...but you have to bypass the beautiful sunny outdoors for... the office. In this one room, you do have some toys to play with, but your mom has to basically ignore you while she answers the phone and types important stuff in the computer for a couple of hours each day. Sounds like fun for Z, right? I think since I've quit my job, camp has been a lot more fun for both of us. :)

Right now, I'm able to help a little bit from home - sometimes Hubby will bring home something for me to type in (registrations, mostly) or a mailing that needs organized, or books to be stapled, so I'm able to help that way. Just because I don't have a 'job' at the camp doesn't mean I'm not a part of the staff, either. I am a 'staff wife', and in that way, I'm an ambassador for the camp - to the campers and other staff, and when I go off camp.

So, as I look into my 2010 Camp Crystal Ball, I see this summer filled with pond time, playground fun, chatting with campers, encouraging staff, lots of meals in the dining hall, and hopefully a good many wagon rides. I know I will probably feel like I should be doing more ministry-related things around the camp, and I'll probably wish I was more involved in some more helpful way than just being there. But it's so important to remember that my main ministry right now is to the two babies God has entrusted to me (so far!), and as a friend at MOPS reminded me yesterday, this is only a season - someday, in another life season, I'll be more available to minister in those kinds of ways, but I won't have the opportunity to minister to my 5-month-old Natalie or my nearly-2-and-a-half-year-old Zachary EVER again - I'll never have THIS summer again.

My summer goals include: Swimming at the pond twice a week, eating lunch and dinner at camp each day, going on a wagon ride whenever possible in our schedule, writing encouraging notes/cards to each of our staffers throughout the summer, spending time each day praying for our staff and campers, attending evening chapel singing with the kids a time or two per week, and (eek, do I even dare to type this???) .........potty training Z (cringe!). (Remind me of my above statement about never having this summer again when I'm embroiled in potty training, will you, please???) :)

We will continue to do a tot school activity or two each day throughout the summer as well, as time allows. As long as Hubby is still gone at work all day every day, I would rather keep doing school, and then take a break in August when Hubby has time off. And after the kids go to bed, I will have some time to myself (Hubby will have to work from the time he gets up until he falls into bed each day, that's just how our summer is), so I'm planning to use that time to organize Z's pre-preschool curriculum plan for the fall - I want to start calendar time as well as focus on a letter a week and maybe some more organized unit activities with lapbooks and file folder games.

Camp is a huge part of our family's lives, and it's a rather unique ministry, so I hope you enjoy hearing about it!

So, my question for you today is, Has there been a camp that has had a spiritual impact in your life? I would love to hear your camp stories!

What I Do

I was just thinking today that while camp is a huge part of my 'real life', I don't write about it on here all that much. And I thought maybe some of you were interested in what it is we actually do 'behind the scenes' of camp! So here I am, to lend some hopefully interesting insights into full-time Christian camp life.

Although we work hard at camp all year long, our summer camp season is the pinnacle of our year, and the crux of what we plan for & pray for all year long. We do hold retreats throughout the fall/winter/spring seasons, and these can be more financially profitable for the camp than our summer season sometimes is, so they are important, too, but when I think about the very center of our camp ministry, it always comes back to summer camp.

Here's the scoop: Parents give us their children for five days & five nights - Monday morning through Saturday morning. We have five days to interact with these campers and change their lives for Christ. Everything we do in those five days matters: the way their counselors speak to them, the things our speaker says in chapel, the way I treat them and their parents at the registration table, the way the kitchen staff serves them during meals, the attitudes the grounds staff displays as they unclog a toilet or mow the lawns....everything matters.

Summer camp is the absolute hardest seven weeks of the year for our family (and for the rest of our staff, as well). But seeing the impact that our staff is able to make on campers during those few days and weeks is worth every second and every minute of frustration and exhaustion and just plain HARD WORK.

One of my favorite memories in camp ministry, one that comes to my mind when I'm thinking of giving up, or getting frustrated with all I am responsible for, and with all I have to do in a short amount of time, is one particular Saturday morning a couple of summers ago. I was rushing around, running to the craft shop, delivering crafts to campers, attempting to deliver leftover snack shack money and shirts and was all frustrated with all I had to do, and my husband was struggling with something, so we were at each other's throats, and exhausted to boot, since it was the end of another exhausting week, and we joined the campers in the chapel to watch a video of the week's events. At the beginning of this closing ceremony, our director asked for those who had accepted Christ that week to come to the front and sign our blessing board (an awesome physical record of those who make decisions during the summer), and NINE campers walked to the front. NINE. I had no idea that our ministry had that impact during that week - I was so focused on crafts, snack shack, and the junk going on around me. As tears rolled down my face, I thanked God for all He does, sometimes in spite of us and our selfishness.

Since I'm also a full-time mom now, my ministry at camp has changed over the last couple of years, to be a little bit more part-time. I work as the camp secretary now, and take my little Z to camp with me. He plays in the office and generally wrecks the place while I attempt to answer emails & phone calls & do various mailings. On Monday mornings, I help the parents check their campers in at registration and spend the rest of the day untangling the mess of money & paperwork left in their wake. It's loads of fun. :) The rest of the week, I do my various secretarial duties and take care of my boy. So, I don't really get to interact with the campers much on a one-on-one basis, as much as a counselor would. But I can make a difference in the way I speak to them when I do get a chance, and how I act while they watch me interact with my family and other staffers throughout the week.

At the beginning of this summer, I asked God what my ministry should be this year, and He reminded me that although I need to be at home more with my little boy (while he naps and sleeps) while others are working hard from 7:00 am to 11:00 pm or later (a counselor's ministry is 24 hours a day), I can use that time to pour into our staff - through prayer, and notes of encouragement. So that has been my goal so far this summer, and a way that God can use me to minister to my child's needs and do His work at camp at the same time.

Although I am looking forward to quitting my paid job at camp at the end of the summer and 'just' being a SAHM, I know I will miss the day-to-day camp ministry. But I also know that God still has a ministry for me and for each member of my family at camp, whether we're paid or not. Maybe those of you who have children have noticed this, but our little ones can open many doors - people of all ages, shy people, even the most frustratingly self-centered teenage campers LOVE to see a baby, and God has and will continue to use this to start conversations, and possibly begin to soften a hard heart in the process. I look forward to seeing what He'll continue to do through me and my family in the future.

I'd love to hear from any of my readers about what ministries you're involved in, and if you have a family, how do you balance your family with your ministry?

God definitely has a sense of humor.

And I'll tell you, He's been using it this week, laughing at me. As I mentioned, our camp's gas went out on Friday. We still have no gas, but we have a kerosene heater rigged up & an electric heater in Z's room, just to make sure he's warm enough. :) Repeat after me: First. Time. Mom. Right? :)

Our stove & oven still aren't working, which is a delightful excuse not to cook-I love it. :) We still have a fridge & microwave- and what more do you need, really? And when the gas went out, I assumed our hot water (like EVERY other water heater on the entire camp) would go out, too. So when we still had hot showers on Saturday morning...and Sunday morning...I figured that we just had a really well-insulated hot water tank & we were still using up the hot water that was left in the tank.

On Saturday, I didn't want to waste our (surely) dwindling hot water supply by running it all the way to the kitchen on the other end of the house to do dishes, so I dutifully spent 15 minutes heating water in the microwave and coffeepot and pouring it into the sink. Then, proud of this resourcefulness and ingenuity, I updated my facebook status to reflect my accomplishment and recieved several complimentary comments. Oh, internets, pride goes before a fall, does it not???

When I still had a hot shower on Monday morning, I decided to finally take five minutes to empty my hubby's clothes out of his closet, and pop in there to check the water heater. In large letters on the side of the tank, our water heater reads, "Electric Water Heater". Yup. And the rest of our staff hasn't had a hot shower since Thursday. I really wish I would've taken those five minutes a few days earlier...

And so of course I had to re-update my facebook friends with my silly miscalculation. Here is what my status read yesterday morning: Carrie says, "Hello, folks, we have an ELECTRIC water heater. Off to clean bathrooms so our whole staff can come over to take showers." I got several comments about how hilarious this was in light of my dishwater microwaving experience, of course. :)

And I can just picture God laughing at me as I was heating that water in the microwave the other day- He DOES have a sense of humor, doesn't he??? :)

How We Got Into Camping

(Alternate Title: People work at camps? Year round? Full-time? Really?)

Yes, that was MY statement, seven years and a few months ago. Does that surprise you? :)

Seven years and one month ago, Hubby (in his pre-Hubby days) began working at a Christian camp in southern Ohio as their full-time, year-round food service director. So you can see from my question that this turn of events must have come as something of a surprise to me. *ahem* UNDERSTATEMENT!

Seven and a half years ago, Hubby and I were enaged (full story here). He was planning on being a pastor and I was planning on being a pastor's wife. Our wedding date was set for May 25, 2002. And then God changed our plans, as He often does. Hubby heard about a job at the aforementioned camp in Ohio, had a couple years experience in food service at college, was 'getting tired'- his own words- of being in college after transferring once, switching majors, etc...and after praying about it & talking to his cousin Amy who also worked at the camp (and talking it over with me, of course, giving me the opportunity to make the above statement)... He decided that it would be a nice change of pace, and he could continue to work toward his degree through correspondence while working at camp.

One small problem remained. Remember how I mentioned our, you know, WEDDING??? Well, after we were to be married, I would still have two semesters of college left- one semester of elementary education classes, and one semester of student teaching. And it would be much easier to finish those classes at Faith, where I was already attending, instead of trying to switch to another state's teaching standards or another school's course requirements. So. After considering all the factors, and through the shedding of many tears, we postponed our wedding seven months until January 4, 2003. (Faith graciously allowed me to do my student teaching in Kentucky, near the camp, so we wouldn't have to wait a whole YEAR longer to get married.)

At the time, it was the hardest decision I had ever made.

Looking back, I have to remind myself that we even postponed the wedding because I don't think of it often- now it seems like our wedding was always planned for January of 2003.

So, on January 7th, 2002, Hubby headed to his new job & home at the camp, and I headed back to college, hundreds of miles from Ohio. I'm sure Heather could tell you stories of all the whining I did about this situation on the way to and from our jobs at Culver's. :) EVENTUALLY (it seemed like forever), we were able to get married, and we began to settle into the 'routine' of camp life.

For those of you who might know about as much about the camping ministry as I did a few years ago, I'll let you in on a little secret. The key to surviving a camp summer or even a busy retreat season, is FLEXIBILITY. At camp, you are there to serve a lot of different people all at the same time, and you never know when a mealtime will be changed or a sudden power outage will cause you to have to figure out what you can serve for lunch using only 8 gas burners & 2 gas ovens. Or, just speaking hypothetically here, you may have to postpone your celebration of Valentine's Day with your brand-new hubby of 6 weeks when you have 300 teens in for a retreat and you lose power because of a horrible ice storm and trees are being uprooted all over the camp and could kill people if they leave the buildings...but that's a story for another day.

When we got married, let me just say that I was possibly the antithesis of flexibility. NOT my strong point. :) When things changed suddenly, I was not (pardon the pun) a happy camper. I like to think that God has changed and grown me in this area, and that I would respond differently to certain situations if I were put in them today...but I honestly can't say for sure.

What I can say for sure is that over the last 6 years that I've been involved in full-time camp ministry alongside my husband, God has placed a love in my heart for the camping ministry. I love all the contacts that God has sent our way through the camp, all the people we've met through summer camp, retreats, volunteer work groups, and camp conferences. When I think of heaven, I think of all the churches we've been a part of and all the weeks of family camp and summer camp and camp conference all rolled into one- all of those people (and SO many more) united in God's presence with no sin and only one singular goal- to praise HIM every moment.

So, I guess what I'm saying is- Come to camp. It's like Heaven.

**Disclaimer for all of you theologians out there- that last sentence was not a theological assertion- it was just a joke. I doubt we'll be singing the "Shark song" in Heaven.**

Ministry

In the last nine months, and even the nine months before that, my ministry has changed dramatically. Before I was pregnant, I poured all of myself- my time, my energy, my life- into camp- weekend retreats, summer camp, and anything in between that needed to be done.

Now, I have a little person depending on me to get him his food, naps, baths, diaper changes, and everything else on a schedule that keeps him secure and happy. I'm still able to help out at camp, working in the office, and assisting with the kitchen during retreats, but not nearly as faithfully as I was once able to.

Tonight, for example, I sat feeding little Z his chicken/squash/cereal delight while everyone else ran around frantically plating brownies, cooking pizzas, and setting out salad bar items. And I regretted not being able to do as much as I'd like to help out.

But as I sat there, being covered in a fine mist of cereal and squash, I realized that my most important ministry of all is to this two-foot-tall little fountain of pureed food (and his daddy). When my two ministries cooperate, and I can wear Z on my back while serving pizza for dinner, that's great. But when these worlds collide, Z has to come first. And I pray that I will never feel guilty or regretful about that.

Summertime

When you work and live in the camping ministry, your summers don't consist of lazy days lounging by the pool or relaxing in air-conditioned comfort. You don't get July 4th off to enjoy picnics with friends or fireworks by the lake. I admit, sometimes I'm just a wee bit envious of people who get to spend their summers with their families this way. But I'm not complaining...because our summer is made up of...

the sound of kids laughing and joking together as they head back to their cabins

the smell and crackle of the campfire as kids and families alike share how their lives have been changed over the last five days

afternoons at the pond, watching people get launched off of the Blob and listening to kids shout or scream as they come down the waterslide

the sound of voices being lifted up together to praise God in the chapel

three deliciously home-cooked meals per day, personally delivered by none other than my heroes, the Kitchen Staff.

uproarious laughter following some pretty dumb jokes or stunts (especially during junior high weeks)

sixteen-hour work days for some of the staff (twenty-four hour days for the counselors!)

tears at the amazing ways God works in campers' lives each week, as they get up in front of everyone on Saturday morning and make a public commitment to live for God

competitive shouts echoing across the camp as the kids play frequent camp games

hours of quality time with the t-shirt press (thankfully, I have an assistant this year- you're awesome, Jill!!)

the inevitable homesick campers

a sense of purpose as we realize we're fulfilling the ministry God has given us each day

relief as an exhausting summer camp season draws to a close

sadness as our fellow staff members, who we have grown closer to than we could have ever imagined, take off to lead their own separate lives again

"I Got Blogged"

Well, here I am, almost to the end of our summer camp season, ready to pick back up with my normal life...which does occasionally include blogging...

Everything with Junior is going really well- I'm five months along, feeling pretty great (a little swollen some days), and being kicked constantly. I read somewhere that how active your baby is in the womb is some kind of indication of how active they'll be as toddlers. If that's true, then look out, world. Here comes the next Tasmanian devil! We have an ultrasound scheduled for next week, and hopefully we'll be able to see great pictures of Junior and figure out whether it's a girl or a boy!!!

Camp has gone well this summer, too. We had 3 weeks of youth camp, and about 20 kids accepted Christ during those three weeks. When you hear of those decisions, then all the hard work and rough days are just totally worth it. We're in our last week of family camp right now. Last week we had a BIG family camp, and Joel's parents were here for it. It was really fun to spend the week with them. This week is going well so far!

This weekend we had a lot of people from our church here for a 'church retreat'. Some of them stayed over Saturday night, and some just came for Sunday. One of the new attractions at camp this year is called The Blob, and it's basically a giant 30-foot long air pillow in the pond. The concept that one person jumps on one end, crawls to the other end, and then another, preferrably bigger, person jumps on and launches the other person off the end. Well, for some reason, the older members of our church could not get the hang of the name of the activity, and they kept thinking that it was called being "blogged". So as one man was crawling to the end, his wife's aunt is sitting at the top of the swimming hill yelling, "Are you ready to get blogged?" Another older man was confused, too, and he said, "Blogged? Why would they call it that? Doesn't that mean saying something bad about someone on the computer?"